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Day 24: Choices and Pathways

Dear Diary,

Have you ever felt really lost when you’re faced with so many good options, you just don’t know what to choose?

I have a dream. How bad do I want this dream to become a reality? Very much, so much so that I am willing to give up almost everything I love and live for currently. That very thought is so dangerous.

If I were to grab an analogy, it would be this:

I have two perfectly okay apples (on the outlook anyway). One will be my current life, and the other will be the apple that can lead to my dream. I know that the one that holds my current life is ripe and juicy, with no worms inside. However, I don’t know if the other apple is fine – not sure if there are worms thriving inside of it. I’ll only know when I take a bite into that apple. But that apple can be perfectly fine.

And I really want to throw the apple away. Because it is delaying my choice to eat the apple that holds my current life. And I am getting hungry.

But… if I throw the apple away, I might not know if another apple that holds my dream will come again. It’s crazy. It’s silly. It’s driving me insane.

I wish there’s an answer out of all this. Maybe… this Saturday will hold that answer. 😦

Love,

Nazira

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